Dear me.
In my internship for Ann Voskamp, this past week she invited us to “write to the woman we are becoming”. The results were fruitful for my own heart, and reflecting on my teammates entries spurred me on to love God, love people, and to think outside of my immediate context in beautiful, thoughtful ways. Here is the result of that prompt":
Dear Emilee,
You are worried about so many things when only one thing really matters.
I want you to make beds, make resources that nourish hearts, make love, make spaces that echo the love of God. I want you to give your money to help translate the Word for those who don’t yet know. I want you to take a younger woman in the faith and adopt her as your own - show her how to play chinese checkers and load the dishwasher while you listen to her talk about boys. Make homemade bread and paint toes and laugh deep, and in the lines in between she will learn how to love God, to love her husband, to live a life poured out within and for the Kingdom of God. Become a leader that is kind, dedicated, that lifts others to a high standard, and shepherds hearts closer to His. I want you to make space for a middle of the afternoon cup of coffee, for sweeping floors, writing lesson plans, and crafting sentences. I want you to open your Bible every morning, even on the days where nothing dazzling happens. I want you to dance freely and not be afraid of female friendship. I want you to raise a family that fiercely loves God and loves people, that brings the lonely and the orphan a place to belong. I want you to dare to make beauty even though someone might not understand, whether it stays in the sketchbook or on walls. Commit to being a lifelong learner with a brain constantly engaged at the bookshelf, asking curious questions, with both heart and hands open in humility as a student of the heart of God. I want you to write books and give talks and design stunning brands and hold hurting hearts. I want you to live fully, even when the church says you’re too radical and the unbelievers say you are wasting your time. I want you to pour it all out for the sake of knowing Christ - because He is worth it all.
Every drop of expensive perfume and heartbroken tears and all the pencil shavings of changed plans at the bottom of your calendar are safe at His feet.
But at the heart? What do you need to do today? How do you create a ministry, a legacy in the middle of folding laundry and messaging on Slack and driving these dirt roads?
Your job for today is to abide deeply in your only true Sustenance, and trust that He will bring effective and abundant fruit out of the richness of your time in the secret place. Memorize words of truth over the kitchen sink, pray with your girlfriends, and read the boring genealogies. Study the commentaries, confess your sin, and donate diapers. Because life is not a competition and constant contrast between what is big for God and what is small - but in faithfulness He is glorified.
Live fully when the world wants you to live comfortably. Live fully not because your best life is found out there in the pursuit of the next affirmation or instant gratification, but because your Good Shepherd gives you everything that you need for life and godliness.
You are worried about many things - the shape of your career, your family, your relationships, but only one thing secures your heavenly success: stay close to His heart in the midst of all these things. Make your home in the love of God, and everything in your home's legacy will be shaped beautifully.
Abide in Him.
Walk beside Him.
Pour it all out for Him.
He is worth it all.
1. If you’re joining from Ann’s blog, I’d love to connect with you on Instagram @emileekkurt. I love sharing over there about my podcast Abundantly, life at church camp, the Word of God, and practical ways to live fully in Christ.
2. If you’d love to reflect on “dear me…” yourself and share with #DearMeLetter #SummerOfJournaling and tag @annvoskamp - we’d love to read how you’re preaching to your soul these days.
